Dirty feet

“Don’t look at my feet, Grandma so you can not see that it’s dirty,” says CJ when he does not want to take a shower before bed.

Good heavens where did he get that? I always washed my feet before I went to bed when I was a little girl.  And CJ’s Dad always showered. Our conversations at least didn’t have indications that former Mom-in-law had isuues with ex-hubster on taking showers when he was CJ’s age.

Honestly I am amused. But perhaps because I am not directly in line at the moment to deal with such 21st century child’s progress in reasoning.

Good old psychology has been right all along to observe that ‘little boys don’t take baths, they just dust off.’ That takes me to a tantrum he threw in Hong Kong because I forced him to take a shower. 

Sometimes now I think I should have just let him dust off, although I don’t think it should apply to dirty feet in bed. How long would this argument last, I wonder, but he’s a boy and I’m just his mom learning, learning, learning.

Mommy Moments & Color Connection

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Shorter strides

“Walking in high heels changes how women walk, puts strains on muscles, and raises risk of injury.”

We know, we know, don’t we? The bit on discomfort at least. But they are irrisistible wardrobe items. Could that be why we may also be aware but not really taking heed of expert observation that wearing high heels takes a toll on muscles and the pocket book?

According to a scientific study published on Medicinenet, the discomfort of wearing high heels can be explained by the changes in mechanics in the way women walk. They walk with shorter, more forceful strides; more muscles are employed and changes persist even when they wear flats or go barefoot.

Nine women who wear high heels for 40 hours or more per week for two years were compared with ten women who rarely wear heels. This is how the study was conducted:

Women walked at their own pace along a 26-foot, flat walkway while wearing electrodes on their feet and legs to measure muscle activity. The walkway was also equipped with a plate to gauge ground reaction forces, and cameras recorded their gait. Both groups walked down the walkway 10 times in their bare feet. Then the high heel wearers walked it another 10 times in their favorite high heels.

The results showed that the high heel wearers had shorter strides and mostly used their muscles to walk rather than the more efficient combination of muscle and tendon stretching employed by the women who wore flats.

Because their feet were stuck in a flexed, toes-pointed position for so long, the calf muscles of the women who wore high heels had also shortened and were under more strain. For example, the muscle strain rate in high heel wearers was about six times higher than in the other women. 

While I am aware of the toll high heels could take on feet, I did not know there could be changes in the way I walk as well. Aha! a duck and a zombie just came to mind.

Because of my job, wearing high heels is a default. I wish I could sometimes wear flats and jeans like university instructors in the US, but that is not the case in Thailand.

What are your reasons for wearing high heels? What kind of shoes do you wear to social activities? I would love to know.

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Justified exposure

May 3-5 came and went. I monitored CJ’s convention activities online. From the grandma’s daily updates I learned that CJ found a friend and was out playing with that friend while sessions went on. Brilliant. But then I go back to conscious-of-his-issues mode and I reiterate brilliant. He socialized and that’s big deal to me. Day 3 was spent celebrating this -

I am happy to see familiar faces: neighbors’ and church friends’ kids. Some of them are regular guests at CJ’s birthday parties for two consecutive years now.

They seem to be sharing a light moment with the audience -

Now I understand why CJ’s developmental pediatrician shook her head firmly when I asked, “is it autism, ‘Doc?” I braced myself for the worst; and it’s one of those rare times when my heart leapt to Cloud Nine for not getting what I expected.

Never mind that I ended up paying for what turned out to be play convention. I just love signs that my money is not wasted on expensive therapy and even more expensive hours at the specialist’s office.

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Organizing Happiness

Do you sometimes think bad moods you feel may be due to the disorganized state of things around you?

If you suspected so, Organizing Happiness can help you, like it helped me deal with clutter issues, acquaint or reacquaint yourself with habits that will make you and others happier, and use spiritual weapons and organization inspiration for happiness.

The longer I have been busy with job and social responsibilities, the farther I have strayed from bible-based advice on living an organized life so well-presented on this ebook.

Being used to having paid help do cleaning and cooking chores for me, my place has become a war zone of clothes, books, stilettos, and my kiddo’s toys here and there  following changes in our living arrangement. Having the practical illustrations and gentle advice of this darling ebook around mitigated my personal struggle with domestic chaos.

Author Lorrie Flem’s attribution of clutter on “not having a designated place to put things” nailed it for me. I actually went to a supermarket to buy keepers.  I also tried the ’15-minute’ suggestion and indeed was amazed to see the bedside table got tidied up, the dresser tamed and the garbage sorted in just 15 minutes.

Under one of four headings in this ebook, I am especially delighted to be reminded of Philippians 4:8 – “Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.”

Be inspired as I am. You can read Organizing Happiness for free by signing up for the Eternal Encouragement newsletter. Find details of this ebook here. Unmistakably relevant to fellow moms keeping a home as well as working single ladies, I am sharing this post over at Mommy Moments , Happiness is…, & Color Connection.

 

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CJ’s convention and CaCoy’s colors

My moment as a mom this week was to enlist CJ in a Children’s Convention on May 3-5. He is going with Grandma. I gladly anticipate results.

As an auntie I recall a happy dining moment with nephew CaCoy.  We – cousins, spouses and kids lazed an entire week away in Huahin, the Thai royal family’s summer home. One of those evenings we had dinner in the night market opposite the beach.

I marvel at CaCoy’s changing colors.  With a half Spanish paternal Grandma I swear he was pale pink as a baby. With football in school his ecru skin slowly vanished. Then he went chasing coconut bugs in the glare of the tropical sun. That was the final straw. He turned midnight black without further ado.

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Color perception

Children. Don’t they amuse or annoy and even confuse when they are cheeky? When they call a white object blue and accompany that declaration with a cute smirk – at least I, as a PDD mom find my mind in a pirouette over a little cheekiness from my boy.

Grandma chats with a neighbor. The chat goes on for awhile and CJ plays precocious: “Shut up!” hands on ears and pretending to be distressed, “I’m going to sleep. Everyone, quiet!”

A friend’s son, Daniel (the chubby chinoy on his mom’s lap) behaves like CJ in some ways. While the rest of the family gathered around the TV for a pinoy movie to conclude our dinner, Daniel and I sat on the bed where he nailed one delightful observation:

Daniel: Auntie, what is that?

Me: (examining the bottle) A liniment. What color is it, Daniel?

Daniel: Green.

Me: (muttering to myself) Thank goodness I don’t have to smell like a quack doctor’s patient with this product. (then back from my private thoughts) Come Daniel, here, lovely winter mint.

Daniel: (in perfect accent and perfectly imperfect grammar) It smell green!

Immediately I was transported to market day in Cortona, to Francis writing on a postcard, “it even smells purple.” Remember Under the Tuscan Sun?  This was obviously a coincidence of color perception but let me just hurray how kids can be marvelous.

Especially when they’re not fighting like cats and dogs as these siblings used to when they were little. Look at them now – so peaceful :D . They’re going to kill me if they discover I’m blogging about them but they are too busy to read their old aunt’s drama so I should be safe for now. That’s the niece in a previous post, the one I gifted with a pair of silver heels for her graduation. I heard they were too big so she stuffed tissue paper in them. What grief those shoes must have caused her toes, poor baby.

These two flew in from Cebu last week. We celebrated Songkran (Thai New Year) together which was loads of fun. I’ll probably blog about that later. Meanwhile, what a diversion tweaking these photos on Photobucket or I probably just had too much time. But surely, happiness is when you don’t have to celebrate a major holiday alone.

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Getting kids to eat healthy meals

It’s a challenge; and understandable enough: if it’s hard getting adults to eat healthy, how do we go about this business on kids?

I check what I am doing or not or have done against professional advice that I read.  MedicineNet nutrition experts suggest ways for parents to guide their children to eat a sound diet.

Avoid power struggle
“Do it because I’m the parent” or worse, “Eat or else…” Have you said something like that to your kids during a meal? Once I told my son, “no eat, no play.” I realize it could be a form of slight power struggle. He ate but couldn’t have understood why he had to eat in order to play. Author of The Parent’s Toolshop Jody Johnston Pawel explains that this rationale does not work for long.

Expose
I had no idea children have to be exposed to a new food 10 to 15 times before they accept it. If they play with a berry on their plate, parents are advised not to give up but keep encouraging them to eat. Suggested exposure is 1 or 2 new foods a week.

Don’t label
We may refer to children who are difficult to feed as “limited eater” rather than “picky.” Experts claim that kids under 5 are normally selective eaters.

Build on the positive
A child’s growth spurt is an opportunity to introduce new foods, but don’t let your child eat all he wants just because things have become easier on the dining table.

 Let kids participate
“Get a step stool and ask your kids to lend a hand with easy tasks in the kitchen,” says Sal Severe, author of How to Behave So Your Children Will Too.  He gives the logic here: if children participate in helping to make the meal, they are more likely to want to try it.

Don’t bribe
Do you use sweets to get your child to eat what you want him to? I sometimes do. But experts advise parents to avoid it because it can send a message that eating veggies should involve a reward.

“The real reward of sound nutrition is a healthy body, not a chocolate cupcake.”

Beware of over-snacking
If you remember your mom or dad giving you less to eat between meals, they were right. The problem is not the child does not like new food, but he is actually already full from snacks. Children can consume a lot of calories from milk and juice or chips and sodas.

“Good snacks are those that supplement meals, not sabotage them.”

Role modeling on the dining table
“Do as I say, not as I do” is not just old, it’s wrong.  You can’t expect your kids to have salad while you are having french fries.

Defuse mealtimes
Don’t discuss your child’s eating habits during meals. Tense talk loses people their appetite. Parents can stress the importance of good eating through stories around bedtime.

Give it time
Children are known to grow out of limited eating as they grow older. One day you may be surprised to see them eat healthy food on their own; without being told.

I didn’t like vegetables for as long as I can remember when I was a kid. But at age 19 that  was no longer the case. I finally learned the value of healthy eating.

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A smoking computer, a real phone and a reason

All the while I was imagining CJ’s computer was being used mainly for homework and educational entertainment. Oblivious me. The use has been more like games. It is probably time to buy a new computer again as the old one overheated last night.  Smoked to kingdom come. Bye-bye Pooh Bear (nickname of CJ’s computer).

So the Grandma complained that after Pooh Bear, CJ’s attention has been on her phone.  I asked what he was doing with it. “Games of course,” Mother sounded exasperated. “But he’s never been exposed to that sort of thing,” I countered.  “Well, hello Girl, it only took your son one look at his cousin doing it, and now he’s into soccer, soccer, soccer!” Ops….

These boys have a little explaining to do.

The poor Grandma tries to hide her phone lest some mischievous fingers tinker their way to it. They usually do and when she needs to use it, she hears this:

“Buy me a real phone Grandma so that I will not borrow yours. Tell Mommy.”

“So that I will not borrow yours.”  Some reasoning, eh? Boys!

Actually I have been eyeing kiddie phones even before CJ was born. But I’ve been putting the plan aside because I only want it for monitoring purposes and ever since I haven’t seen the need. Following last night’s awakening I googled kiddie phones, and saw these choices:

Some have parental control, and some have only two buttons – “Mom” and “Dad.”

Will I be bonkers to hope that they do not have games in their techie bellies? I’d love to hear your thoughts or recommendations.

The phone game investigation still stands. But I’m not hard to negotiate with. A few cute antics and my heart melts away forgetting that Pooh Bear is now resting in peace.

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Graduation Season

‘Tis the season for medals, ribbons, caps and gowns in the Philippines!

A cousin’s son finished kindergarten and took home many awards, the niece I talked about in a previous post wore the graduation gift I sent her and posted photos on Facebook. I wanted to steal one to show off here but decided against it (lol).

On moving up day CJ got a ribbon for being most obedient. I was more amused than impressed. At home CJ could be quite difficult to handle when it comes to obeying but my mother and I thought it was better not to contradict the teacher :)Over at my faculty a Business Administration graduating class gave me a basketful of ‘thank you’ gift. The medal is CJ’s. He got it while attending K1 in Bangkok.

More happy stuff – Mother hosts dinner for nephews and nieces who are on school break, a nephew’s girlfriend gives birth, and CJ socializes with his cousins – which is big deal to me considering his developmental issues. The therapy sessions must be working and I am getting my money’s worth.

With Father gone, and I, absent from home 99% of the year, besides being an only child with an only child and without a husband – I really get excited when cousins and their families visit us. Our empty nest comes to life with food and chatter.

This post is shared with Happiness is…, Mommy Moments and Color Connection.

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Children’s Poetry Day

A heap of celebrations fill March 21st – International Day for the Elimination of Racial Discrimination, National Common Courtesy Day…. Out of thirteen there are two that particularly attracted me: National Single Parents Day and Children’s Poetry Day.

Raising my kid all by myself makes me fond of National Single Parents Day. On its FB page this About is written:

The goal of National Single Parents Day is to empower single parents and their friends and family…. Public awareness of issues affecting single parents is so important.

Thank goodness I do not own all single parent-related issues in the world. God must love me this much he has granted me enough financial independence for as long as I can remember after earning work qualifications.

To commemorate Children’s Poetry Day, let me share this poem from iloveindia.com. I italicized lines that are not true to my son, nor to me.  The rest are.

My Childhood
My childhood was fun, tough and exciting,
My childhood was one where there wasn’t much fighting,
This is my childhood. My childhood was filled with family and friend(s),
My childhood was filled with love and lots of happy holidays,

My childhood was filled with tricycles and bicycles,
My childhood is filled with lots of classwork and homework,
My childhood is filled with parents that don’t work,
Annoying loving brother and sisters.

This is my childhood. My childhood is filled with a grandmother that was caring and loving

When I left her, I was hurt. But it’s for the best.
I remember the good and happy times we shared together.
This was my loving childhood that I will not forget. This was my childhood.

Now what are these ‘robots’ interlapping my talk for? There was a Japanese-Thai Anime fest last week and I thought CJ would have had fun at this show. These toys are banned at home to follow his therapist’s advice.

But once in awhile I allow him to play, admire and/or fantasize on these things. A little dose of indulgence won’t kill his imagination.

This post is shared with Happiness is…, Mommy Moments and Color Connection.

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